Just a daily dosage of the amazingness that is The Office.
Feel free to submit items from The Office in "Quote" form if only one person spoke, "Chat" form if more than one person spoke, video, or image. Submissions will be placed at the top of the queue.
“You looking for dinner and a movie?‘Cause you’re not gonna find it in that box.”
- Andy (to Angela)
Andy:Fine. I’ll just sit at my desk and be quiet. Sorry I annoyed you with my friendship. [hidden cell phone starts to ring] Excuse me. And I’m also sorry that a lot of people here for some reason think it’s funny to steal someone’s personal property and hide it from them. Here’s a little newsflash! It’s not funny! In fact, it’s pretty freakin’ unfunny! Oh, my GOD.
Andy:That… was an overreaction. Gonna hit the break room. Does anybody want anything? Pam, you good?
Dwight Schrute: I'm temporarily lifting the shun.
Andy: Thank you.
Dwight Schrute: It means nothing. I want you to do something for me.
Dwight Schrute: Okay, calm down. I need you to acquire an inflatable house and/or castle.
Andy: You mean a moon bounce.
Dwight Schrute: What do you think. You've got an hour.
Andy: I'm gonna need petty cash.
Dwight Schrute: Shunning resumed.
Andy: Do you want a draw bridge?
Dwight: Un-shun. Yeah, that sounds good. Re-shun.
Dwight Schrute: Jim, could you please inform Andy Bernard that he is being shunned?
Jim Halpert: Andy, Dwight says welcome back and he could use a hug.
Dwight Schrute: Okay, tell him that that's not true.
Jim Halpert: Dwight says that he doesn't actually know one single fact about bear attacks.
Dwight Schrute: Okay. No. Jim tell him bears can climb faster than they can run. Jim! Tell him!
Andy: Beer me!
Jim Halpert: What’s that?
Andy: Hand me that water. I always say, ‘beer me.’ It gets a laugh like a quarter of the time.
Andy: What're we doing? What's the game? I want in.
Jim Halpert: Oh there's no game, we're just trying to get these chips for Karen.
Andy: Did you check the vending machine?
Karen: Ohh the vending machine. How did we miss that?
Jim Halpert: I have no idea. We went right for the copier, and then we checked the fax machine.
Andy: Did you check, your butt?
Andy: Why did you do that?
Jim Halpert: I'm just killing Germans any way I can.
Andy: We're on the German team. Shoot the British!
Jim Halpert: Wait, are we playing teams?
Andy: Pama-lama-ding-dong. Listen, you're cute. There's no getting around it. So, I don't know if you like country music, but I was thinking maybe one of these days we could drive out to a field, crank up some tunes, smoke a few Macanudos, maybe even toss a disc around. Utway ooday ooyay inkthay, Ampay?
Pam Beesly: Wow... I--
Andy: Shhh. Think about it. I'll hit you back.
Dwight Schrute: Which is higher, Assistant Regional Manager or Regional Director in charge of sales?
Michael Scott: I told you the titles were irrelevant. They just relate to payscale.
Dwight Schrute: Okay, so who gets paid more. Me or Andy?
Michael Scott: It is not a matter of more or less, your pay is just different.
Andy: Best ad ever? [singing] Give me a break…gimme a break…break me off a piece of that…[stops] I am totally blanking! What is the thing?
Jim: Nobody tell him!
Andy: What? No…why?
Jim: You got it, you’re so close.
Andy: Break me off a piece of that…apple sauce
Jim: Break me off a piece of that apple sauce. I don’t think that’s…
Andy: Piece of that Chrysler car…football cream…